The greatest fear~

One of the greatest fears might be to one day realize one is insignificant. To have lived a life that touched no one deeply, to not have loved passionately, to not have given for the sake of giving and not to have believed in something much greater than oneself. And scarier even than all of that is to have lived without ever meeting or knowing who we are.

Day 39 of 365~

Image taken somewhere in New York

Day 24~ August 24th~ Boracay

sailing upstream

River salmon has a very strange life pattern. It hatches upstream, swims downstream towards the ocean, matures downstream and then swims back upstream against all odds and strong currents, struggling and even jumping up waterfalls to make it back to the place where its life originated and eventually die there. I wonder if that’s the amount of superhuman effort needed for us to live our lives as they were meant to be lived, against all what tries to drag us downstream towards the oceans of mediocracy. To live a life aligned to human purpose would mean going against so much in order to escape being  just another one amongst the lost.

Day 26~ March 26th~ Egypt

inside the shaft of the great pyramid

The Pyramid of Khufu in Giza, the greatest and largest pyramid known to us, I had the chance to walk inside it in 1996. If you find the pyramids mysterious and impressive on the outside which everyone I know does, then the inside will leave you mystified! The pyramid of Khufu is constructed with shafts like this one in the photo above that are perfectly straight and on a large scale connecting in a strange maze that no one seemed to have figured out the purpose of despite many various efforts.

The wooden steps you see in the very old photo I took back then were added to allow tourists to walk up the shaft that leads to the king’s chamber.

It was a very strange feeling being in a such a wonder of the ancient past and thinking only how futuristic it felt.

(writing this post and the next few while away in NYC, so I will have very little  to reply to comments, but hopefully will catch up soon :))

Day14~ March 14th~ Egypt

lost in the sand

I went to Egypt looking for adventure. I got far more than what I bargained for…

A group of 25 something friends from all around the globe, all eager to find the truth, we headed into the desert on a moonless night to gaze at the stars and dwell on the mysteries of Egypt. It was magical to say the least, until a few hours later someone looked around and we had a feeling one of our friends was missing. We called her name into the pitch darkness but nothing returned other than the eerie stillness of the desert night. It was the kind of darkness where you could not see your own hand, let alone another person lost in the sand. We desperately came up with a plan to separate into groups of 2 and walk around looking and feeling for our friend. We spent about an hour of very high emotional distress and thoughts going all over the place and expectations of the worst possible. We were each running the risk of getting lost ourselves, if not for a far away light that we left as a marker and a place to meet at the end of our search. Our local friend and guide who was with us walked finally to the nearest road and managed to call the hotel in Cairo only to discover that our friend was showered and in bed after having been lost, finding the road and hitchhiking to the hotel while we were busy searching for her.

That night, people of different religions, backgrounds, nationalities and ages worked together while faced with a crisis, an Arab with a German, a christian with a jew, a European with an American, all towards one purpose, the safety of another human being. Amazing how a real life situation can cause all the ‘stuff’ that does not belong to being human, to be shed away, dropped for the sake of our shared humanity. A great lesson was learned by all that night, as the deserts of the planet can do that to us.

Day 3~ March 3rd~ Egypt

Ka (ancient wooden statue with out-stretched set of arms above the head at the Cairo museum)

While searching and researching inside the realms of Ancient Egypt, the unseen comes into focus as the seen gradually gets blurred…

The ancient Egyptians believed that each person hosted in themselves a double, an electrical entity that ushered and guided them towards their true destiny. They called it the Ka. Their Ka was to live beyond the death of their physical bodies and mummifications served as preparations for homes that the Ka would one day return to inhabit.

Their lives were lived in great discipline as to remain pure and adhere to purpose because any deviation from purpose was an abomination of the Ka.

What was most haunting for me standing in front of this statue was the look in its eyes. It was the kind of look that can take you on a journey, far beyond where you would normally be.

Day One Hundred Seventeen, May 19, 2011

Where to set our standards?

I write and I muse a lot about the question and fact of choice. Today, was no exception. I was looking at things from the angle of standards. We are given almost complete freedom as humans to choose how we align ourselves and what standards we set for our lives. Where do we draw that line? What in life falls below our standards? How firm are we about the line of separation of what we allow into our lives and what we deem unfitting to enter into the inner sanctum of our personal temples. In this defining line I find a safety, a protection and a promise to myself that I do respect my life that I was given. And in our ‘modern’ world today, nothing is more difficult than keeping high standards

photo: barbed wire, Dongchang lu, Shanghai

Day One Hundred Seven, May 9, 2011

Looking beyond

We are born into this life with a huge credit, a grace period, a fuel of high energy to kick start our young life. In our young days, we are full of energy, full of enthusiasm, of a feeling of power, feeling almost immortal. We are also given free choice of what to do with this gift, where to invest it, how to manage it, spend it, waste it, grow it, give it, or simply watch it waste away. Then at some point, as we age, we begin the feel the pangs of mortality, this burst of power is not forever, our bodies are not actually invincible, and life on this planet may actually have a greater purpose. The most wonderful gift of all is the fact that at any point in our lives we are able to go shift gear and to go deeper into the search for what is beyond the seen. But how late is too late? Have we done enough to allow ourselves a sigh of satisfaction over a life well lived…

Just an early morning meaning of  life ponder.

Photo: Old man with hat and beard, Shanghai, May 9, 2011